Y’all…last time I wrote about Miley and Wayne I was really upset. I don’t want to rehash the whole thing with Wayne making us all feel completely Miley-potted with a super overpriced last minute Dead Petz preview show in October, and for the record I’ve stopped taking birth control pills since then and my temper is back under control. Suffice it to say I said some things I didn’t mean and I’m sorry. And I didn’t just say them because I was angry, I said them because they reflect the sentiment of how many other fans feel.
But I am thrilled to report that the real Miley and Her Dead Petz show was so beautiful it washed away all my sins in it’s Milky Milk-glory. She can go from sounding like Stevie Nicks to Kurt Cobain to Adele in the same breath while always sounding just like herself. Some of her Dead Petz lyrics are so relatable I feel like my guts are being turned inside out listening to them. Yes, I complained about not being able to get into the Dead Petz album fully. But like many records I’ve complained about in the past, when played live it made way more sense and now I totally love it. Seeing this show was like seeing Bangerz Tour, a multi-million dollar stadium production, but in a theatre that holds around 1500 people.
When Miley’s dog Floyd was killed while she was out on Bangerz, all I could do was imagine my losing my own dog and having to go out and shake my ass to give people who love and support me the party they’re dying to be at. I openly wept thinking about this in April 2014 right when it happened, and I openly wept at the Dead Petz show 3 times. Once during Floyd’s song, again during Pablow-fish’s song and again when she made her speech about the tour. The show was being livestreamed, so this was her big opportunity to explain the concept.
I can’t find the exact quote, but it was something to the effect of this is the tour she wanted to do after having to go twerk on a gold car with a broken heart because losing a pet is akin to losing a member of your family, at least in the short term. She said she felt like she wasn’t allowed to mourn or be upset in front of people during that time because it wasn’t the loss of a human and thus shouldn’t carry the same emotional weight. But that’s baloney, I’m holding my dog crying right now just at the idea of losing him. And he’s really confused.
For me, the Milky Milk Tour was an unprecedented combination of rock stardom and celebrated emotional vulnerability. When Miley plays on her giant disco ball piano belting her heart out about the sadness of seeing her friends eating her friends at sushi dinner, she makes it badass to be sensitive. And thank fucking Christ, I’ve been playing it cool for way too long. The best part is I can’t even find a photo of the moment I’m talking about because Miley asked everyone to quit taking photos a few songs in, and people actually did it!
This is a good segue to an apology I must make. Wayne – I’m sorry for being so unreasonably angry with you. I know what it’s like to be so hyped out you forget yourself. At your Christmas party last year when everyone turned into selfie zombies while Miley was trying to DJ and she had to run for her life, I wanted you to protect her. I wanted you to get on the mic and remind everyone to be kind, I want you to set the standard for your fans of how they should treat people. And I did feel misled coming out for the surprise Dead Petz preview – never in y’alls entire career have you charged $1 a minute for a Flaming Lips show. But anyway, I’m over all that and v. ready to get back to loving you unconditionally – you and the rest of mankind no matter what. Ok? OK. Thank y’all for helping me See.